My own Response to my former post

Loving yourself

Beauty is Skin Deep

Growing up was marked with body image issues. It followed me all the way to college. I didn't feel comfortable with my body. But then I began to work on my self esteem and I began to like myself more and more. But that changed again. About a year and a half ago I was in a car accident that left me with torn cartilages in my left wrist, four herniated disks, and several broken bones in my right foot. I needed two surgery to fix my foot. I still do not have full mobility in my foot but I am much better now.

Throughout this whole ordeal, I gained a lot of weight. About 35 pounds in fact. I was also differently abled. I was on crutches and in surgical boots for about nine months. I couldn't walk very well which caused the weight gain. I once again began to feel ashamed and embarrassed of my body. I didn't want anyone to see me and I avoided social situations.

I worked all summer to get the weight off. I got most of it off but still struggle body image issues. But in hindsight, there is so much I can say about my body. I am actually amazed at how well my body has recovered from such an ordeal. I am amazed at the transformation it has undertaken from the accident to now. The body really is an amazing apparatus that is under appreciated and put under way too much scrutiny. So here is to celebrating our bodies and the perfection of being who we are!!!!

What I want to be when I grow up

When I was little I had decided that I was going to be nun. It was a decision I made because I was desperate to get out. But at that age I wasn't sure how to explain what I was running away from or to. Now that I'm older, I know what that is. I want to be gay. I want to live a life free of gender roles. I want to live a life free of what society expects of me as a womin. Well, now that I know that, I no longer want to be a nun. (Thank goodness because I am not Catholic. I have no idea how well that would have gone for me.)

Moral of the story: people just want to be themselves.

Elementary Testing

"Little fingers writing
          little brains racing
Nausea, exhaustion, anxiety
Students are exploited
Under the system of our
academic sweatshop"


This was a short poem I wrote yesterday while the children were taking some acuity exam. They were in testing the whole day. What is this nation turning into when all that is worried about is test scores and data? I really wonder, when does actual teaching take place?

I feel like this most of the time

Mirrors

There are some people who serve as mirrors to us. They show us who we are, our flaws, the ugly, the beautiful, and our strengths. I have encountered a few of these people in my lifetime, but recently I have come across a different type of mirror.

A few months ago, I meet some very wonderful people. one of them in particular stands out in mind. He is absolutely inspiring and amazing. He has edited/written books, traveled all over the world, well educated, known, and well versed. When I look at him he reflects everything that I am not. He reflects the person that I had wanted to be, had the potential to be and am not.

I wonder, what do I reflect?

I'm not sure if I like what there is inside of me, so I hide.

Now I'm the adult

When we're kids, we are the little people roaming around clueless. We explore society and the world around us, always with the guidance of the an adult. We come to view the adults around us as strong and independent. Some of them are people we can relay on. As we get older, so do the adults around us. So they become older and sometimes physically weaker, and then we become the adults.

So, I am now facing the inevitable fact that the adults in my life are getting older, and I am now being inducted as the new adult generation. I am not sure if I am completely equipped to deal with this.